I had five good days, now going down. Mikey Hirt my feeling Really bad I wanted to go spen time with sister. I took meds last night and did not eat enough before meds. I just wanted go to bed early. He knew how bad and hopeless I felt when I got up to to bed I feel backwards on the steps. Had to hear him yell at me. Okay yes medication sometime hits me quicker bur also when I get up fast I am dizzy. Then that is when he told he was reluctant to let me go and now I can't drive there what I feel over there and hurt myself. I promised sis I was comiing she really needs me there. Then I was informed that he drive me there and drop me off come back to get me. She lives 5 hours from here. I knew that would be along drive to hear about what could happen and he would not be able to just come pick me upp. His other solution is him hire someone to take. O yes when i He think he can hurt me no more WRONG!!!inwhent to wind the grandfather clock I dropped the the tool. He came over and starting yelling at me , what are you doing? He told me I did not know what I was doing. He said you have to stop the pendialem before winding it up. I always did that way be yelled you are going to over-stress wire. I'm going to stay right here my bed Such is life. At least I did have 5 days of happiness. Knock me down when I a. Already fell sad and hopeless. And he wonders why I am sad. Hurt and mad. It was like a waterfall widen I told sister can't come. Oh yes let's don't forget I am dangerous to my self and others. Si if stay in bed can't hurt or disappoint anyone. Tills best friend do no come over today. ;(