On Monday it will be 2 weeks since I came home from the hospital in the last 2 weeks things have been crazy! I am trying to make so many changes & at times it gets overwhelming . I am so scared of getting into another downward spiral!!!!! Each time I feel a twinge of depression I get freaked out that it is happening again. I don't Ever want to be in that dark place again!!!!! Things aren't helped by my parents who are Not supportive at all in fact just the opposite they try to tear me down every chance they get & make things harder on me if they can . Why must they do that to me? I thought me putting myself in the hospital would show them their really was a problem but it hasn't…they think I did it to hurt them & the Dr's were just pretending to treat me! Why the heck would the Dr's do that? They don't let u check into the hospital unless u really need to be there!!!!!!!!! I wish for once they would just believe me & not make it all about them….this wasn't about them it was about me!!!!!!!!! Working on getting MA the card should come in a few days & then my medication & psychiatrist will be covered so won't have to fight them on that anymore which will be a huge help & relief. Just need to figure out how to pay for my gas & counselor yet & then they can get off my back about the money all the time. Need advice on how to deal/live with so much negativity… until I can work enough to save up some money & get the heck out of this place.