So… I went to my interview(s) @ X-Mart today. I knew it would be a way bigger ordeal than was warrented. Those corporate-owned, money mogel, big-box stores aways seem to blow themselves up way bigger than life when doing something as simple as hiring new help. I got there and found myself in a room full of at least 14 other interviewees.

The 1st interview was in a room with about 9 tables set up in very close proximity. the 2nd interview was in a private office, than then I was left with a woman who told me they wanted to hire me–depending on whether or not my background check/pee test panned out all right. I'm not worried about the pee, at least. The idea of a background screening has me wondering… I have no criminal background and a few good references. My credit is (newly) clean… but… you know… Some jobs just aren't worth mentioning anymore.

Please, people. I swear I'm finished screwing up now. Learned my lesson good and proper. Can I just have a job? Hey, I may have said some off-the-wall things in my past, but I'm nothing if not honest. I promise to be good and nice from now on.

I told my fiance that I was going to take whatever nastiness the public had in store for me with a great big shit-eating grin. *Thank you, sir! May I have another?* He agreed that I might have to let myself get knocked off my high-horse. I assure you; my high-horse has retired to the glue factory, okay?

I just graduated with honor with a bachelors in English and I just got a temp job at X-Mart. That's too flipping hilarious to feel uppity about. Come on, Joe Public! Hit me with your best shot! I'll LOVE it when I'm rockin' the red polo and khakis. Yeeeehaaaaawwww.

I sat in a room full of people today–most in jeans, one woman was covered in tatoos,  two girls were in flip-flops, and one dude had an afro (actually it was a very well-groomed fro, and he was dressed pretty nice, so I'm exempting Afro-dude from the list of WTFers). One quarter of the applicants in that room spent the waiting time texting. *sigh!* See? Watch me NOT get the job after all. All I did was sit there and silently pray.

Maybe some day this'll make a sweet sit-com. I'll write it and laugh all the way to X-Mart with my first royalty check.


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