I kind of have a lot of things that I’m dealing with right now. My whole life I have had extremely bad anxiety and depression. I was diagnosed as bipolar about 3 years ago. And now, I’m still going to doctors to try and figure out what exactly is wrong, but I’m pretty sure I have something called Pain Disorder. Basically I hurt all the time with no idea why and doctors can’t find an explanation so they think I’m faking it. Some days I can barely get out of bed, which adds to my depression because I feel like I’m a useless failure; and adds to my anxiety because I feel like I won’t be able to accomplish the goals that I have set for myself. I used to cope fairly well with my anxiety and everything, but my depression got way worse about a year ago when my brother kicked me out of his house so I had to drop out of university. I was going to one of the most competitive art schools in the country and it was really hard to get into and I just had to walk away because I had nowhere to live. I felt helpless and now I feel like I’ll never be successful again like I was all throughout high school and university. My main problem is worrying about what to do with my life. but everyone says that “for now you just have to focus on getting better” and what? sit around all day doing absolutely nothing while my friends go to school, work, travel, do fun things with their lives? And my bipolar disorder isn’t any better, it’s actually getting worse because of all this extra stress and anxiety. Basically I’m just a mess. So yeah… many reasons why my mind isn’t in the best place right now.