I'm having something of a rough time right now. My classes are okay but emotionally I'm somewhat of a mess. I feel kinda down a lot and I lack motivation although I never really seem to have much of that anymore…

Kids keep drawing mean things on the whiteboard on my door so I finally just ripped it down last night after someone drew something nasty on it. Why me? Why does no one ever like me? I couldn't help crying over it and I'm still upset. I feel down, I feel insecure.

All I did this weekend was play WoW. I didn't eat much, I didn't talk to anyone much. Even when I wasn't enjoying it, it was just a way to pass the day. I know that I need to be more active, I need more fresh air, I need to take steps towards being happier but it's really hard. And I find myself wondering why I wasted even more time just laying around feeling bad.

On a Good Day

Little bit lost and…
Little bit lonely
A little bit cold here
A little bit feared

But I, hold on
And I
Feel strong, and I
Know that I can

Getting used to it
Lit the fuse to it
Like to know who I am

Been talking to myself forever…yeah
And how I wish I knew me better, yeah
Still sitting on the shelf but never
Never seen the sun shine brighter
And it feels like me, on a good day

(on a good day)

I'm a little bit hemmed in
Little bit isolated
A little bit hopeful
A little calm

But I, hold on
And I
Feel strong, and I
Know that I can

Getting used to it
Lit the fuse to it
Like to know who I am

Been talking to myself forever…yeah
And how I wish I knew me better, yeah
Still sitting on the shelf but never
Never seen the sun the shine brighter
And it feels like me, on a good day

1 Comment
  1. ancientgeekcrone 10 years ago

    I think people are repelled by depression, since the feeling is contagious.  They are probably reacing to your depression.  Do you have tharaputic support. I found therapy very helpful. I also was on meds.  They were helpful also.

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