Well I guess I dont know how to start this or anything like that at all actually, but I am basically looking for a place to write how I feel and hopefully get some help.
I have been diagnosed with scoliosis and PCO. I am likely to be diagnosed with EDS soon also. All of this is complicating my life as I am 19 with the body and health of a 90 year old.
To be honest these are the least of my problems though. I will start at the beginning.
My mother and father split when I was 2, my father threw me and my pregnant mother out. She was the main thing in my life whilst I was growing up I never wanted to leave her side, I remember my dad used to visit me once every now and then on easter and bring the cheapest egg around, but I was too young to understand who he was. My mother married my stepdad when I was 6, her first marriage (yes i am a bastard) and her first real love. I was so happy butat the age of 9 my real father appeared again after 4 years of silence.
This time I was 9 playing in my front garden and he jumped out a dustbin truck calling my name, saying Im your father. I was scared but when he visited a week later asking to see me once a month I took the chance to try and get to know him. It lasted two months after that lies piled out every month. I started to become curious and exlplore I travelled to his house and witnesses lie after lie. so i left it.
I lived with my little brother, mum and stepdad. my brother ED* had ADHDand his behaviour got worse soon he had to move with my nan, this was awful a big loss for me as we were like 2 peas in a pod. Soon I started secondary schooland made friends but because I am alternative I got bullied a bit.
In 2004 my mum had a baby boy, beautiful and wonderful little man but we soon found out he has autism. This is one of my main issues , he is so fragile and i am so scared about his future, 2008 my little sister was born, hip dislocated, scoliosis of the spine BADLY! this is problem number 2 If it gets worse it could pierce her internal organs.
My mother as I said everything to me , she has part of her back wasting away and I feel i wasnt easy on her all these years so its partly my fault.
So to sum it up :
1. Im scared about what will happen to my mum
2. Im scared for my little sister
3. Im scared for my little brother
4. ED* is on a downward spiral (drugs,crime)
5. My grampa has cancer (terminal )
6. My older sister may have autism
7 . I HATE MY LIFE.