I can never get use the sharp pain that I feel in my chest. How my heart feel as if it is ripping through my flesh as my rib cage bust open and my bones crack. There is something not right about having these kinds of pains. These pains are a symbol of my present life situation. It is representation of the present state of my life. As I breath and my lungs expands I start to have a problem breathing. There are times when I wish I could stop breathing all together just so that the pain would go away or at least subside. Every time the world become to much and every time the walls start to close end my body tell me that the pressure is to much to handle. The pressure continues to build as children cries out to be reunited with their families but reality hits that it is only a fantasy, its continue to build as love one continue to poison themselves then lash out, out of anger because they are to weak to fight to stay alive, it continues as childhood friends are lost in the cold dark street refusing to deal with lost all the while leaving their children wondering why their mother don't love them enough to come home. It continue as this darkness that I have creeps its way back into my life. It continues until my chest finally burst sending me to the hospital with unanswer questions. Why does this have to be this way? I ask myself why I am not normal and why I am always under attack? What is the purpose of all emotion? When will my heart and mind stop hurting each other? When will the light drive out the darkness? When will the chest pain stop?