The first assumption you want to make abut someone is their gender. Boy or girl? XX or XY? Dick or pussy? Well, when you look at me, you can’t tell. I’m what people call ‘androgynous’. I dress like I’m somewhere in a limbo between a girl and a boy. I wear polo’s and jeans with black sneakers and carry around books. I have short hair and aviator glasses that hide green eyes with ridiculously long eyelashes. My hips aren’t too-curvy and they aren’t ‘flat either. My chest is mostly flat and my thighs are normal. People want to pass me off as one or the other, but what if I’m both? Hi, my name is Youcan’t Figure Meout from Normal-Town, USA, and I’m a gender-fluid middle-school er.
Now Playing \’The Good, The Bad, and the Dirty\’ by Panic! At the Disco.
I’ve been through my fair share of hate and discrimination, but the worst of it came from this girl at school. My girlfriend and I were sitting next to each other at an all girls assembly. It was the perfect time to cuddle with my NotGonna NameHer, so I put my arm around her shoulders. We sat and watched whatever was going on, lazily making comments about the speaker when a foot collided with my shoulder. Like a sane person, I turned around and saw the girl kick me again. I distinctly remember her saying ‘Uh-uh, I don’t wanna see that. Disgusting faggots.’ I instantly remembered her being (yet another) person who teased my in elementary school. Name and everything. We though nothing of it and turned back around. (I also cockily put my arm back around her shoulder to piss the asshole off. 😁)
Now Playing ‘The End/Dead’ by MCR.
But it doesn’t end there. While talking to my girlfriend about what happened at school, we got a text from a mutual friend of ours. It turned out to be a screen-shot photo of a snap. On said snap was me and my girl sitting and watching the assembly. Across the screen was a caption that said, ‘Ewwwww’. First of all, stay away, homophobic bigot! Second, I deserve an even amount of w’s, thank you very much! But it wasn’t the lack of a sixth w that bothered me, it was that I used to be friends with the human being that took that picture. And that hurt. The reason we fell out was because I told her I was gay, and I was fine not being friends with her, but to be publicly made fun of behind my back is another matter.
Now Playing ‘Always on My Mind’ by The Pet Shop Boys.
Now, I know that this is my first blog, but I want to thank you for reading! Please be sure to take care of yourself and the ones you love! I’ll try to post as soon as I’m inspired.
#genderfluid #homophobicbigot #lgbtproblems #chromosomes
Damn. I gotta say, hearing your story really touched my heart, negative and positive. I’m gender queer, considering gender fluidity and I’m mostly lesbian. I haven’t opened up to many people and, even though I tell people it’s alright, I don’t say anything. I’m afraid. I’ve been bullied before and don’t want to be again. I don’t know how to feel about this post, TBH.
Silence, fear and uncertainty are all natural reactions. I know it had to be really scary, being bullied and having to deal with personal issues, but it does get better. If you ever need to talk, my messages are always open. Thank you for reading my blog, and I really appreciate your courage to say that you’re afraid. I would’ve never been able to do that.