Hey Eric….? I sure hope you are still with us here on planet earth!! It is a better place with you in it!! Because I am sure that you have a caring heart, and hope you have a chance to share your love with others.
~♥~
I wish I was there with you so I could offer you a comforting hug ( but only if you want one ). I do not know how to assure you that I am being genuine with you. Let me start by introducing myself…. My name is Iris and I am a transgender woman who is in my early twenties, I went through puberty when I was nineteen!*
~♥~
Please, please, please… Try to find someone who is willing to listen to your and offer some calm, logical and comforting advice. I hope you eventually learn that how you are feeling is valid! And you may be happier if you let some of your internal pressures go.
~♥~
I get this pressure relief partially by being active, riding horses, working on the family farm…. and best of all – splitting firewood manually. I get my arms swinging, my heart rate goes up and I just let all of my jumbled up feelings loose. Those poor rounds of wood, they probably do not deserve how brutally I treat them. But I eventually learned that it is healthier for me long term, to let these feelings out externally. And not by self harming (I used to cut myself).
~♥~
Even when they do not understand, parents have the responsibility to teach their children good morals and demonstrating them by example.
~♥~
Here are a few of the ideas that seemed to help me when I was trying to describe my internal turmoil to my parents: Write down how you are feeling, I prefer longhand because it forces me to focus on the words I am trying to use. After you have read through what you have written [aloud] hearing my words in my own voice helped me gain confidence in what I was trying to say. Feel free to go through as many edits as you want. Try to talk with just one parent first, find a calm time and place to have this difficult and emotional conversation. Maybe make some tea first? And have some tissues at hand, maybe a notepad and some pens….?
~♥~
Sending out to you some love, compassion, hope and optimism. – Iris

* Because my parents we empathetic enough to listen to me while I grew up. And I was given the opportunity to work with my medical doctor and several therapists. Over the course of many years to reach a conclusion: I needed ( time ) to decide what I wanted to do. Time to be evaluated, and eventually be prescribed medications ( Hormone Blockers ) to block the upcoming nightmare of male puberty.