I realized something about my self the other day. At first When my last relationship was broken off it hurt, and then maybe 2 or 3 months later I felt free. Free to know that my tomorrow was going to be whatever I want it to be I guess. It’s weird to think people are born by them selves and we always crave companionship. We crave to be hugged, kisses, listened to and mostly cared for. I guess everyones affection preference is different.
I was laying in bed yesterday thinking about the last time someone said “I love you.” It was used as a plead. It was used to convince me to stay, or as a string to keep me attached. The words i love you isn’t a phrase that makes my heart flutter. It isn’t words that have very many meanings left to it. It sounds like when someone says “hello” or “Good morning”.
I hear it comes from my family also, we really love you but.. That but after is just ridiculous to me. When a person says “I love you but” I don’t except it. I don’t except those words anymore. I know what “Love” is to me. EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN definition. I understand that Its not like off the back I question peoples intentions with me. Maybe I pay too much attention to it.
I haven’t felt in love with anyone lately. Not with someone who isn’t related to me. I love my siblings, I care and all that stuff that comes with family. Although I’m staying open to growing myself and I am half expecting someone to come along who just randomly clicks with me. But the word Love is just not so exciting anymore. hah isn’t that funny.