My life in a nutshell is broken.
I am 45 and take care of 2 elderly parents rgar are eating me alive.
I was laid off of work two years ago and that is when my 83 year old dad got really sick. In addition to looking for a job, I spent my days changing bandages twice per day, doing his medication, several weekly doctor's appts. All the while all he did was berate me and my mother.
Now my mother has fallen ill as well and although she can still walk, she has trouble controlling her diabetes. I try very hard to keep her on a sensible diet but she refuses to eat the right way blaming my father and anyone else she can blame.
I, in the meantime, spend many days being accused of taking their money, not being a good enough daughter- she hates my best friend and any outside activities that I have. They both find ways to keep me from attending events like movies or job interviews. I take an absolute pounding mentally. I have taken to taping it when she or he comes at me….it is total abuse and if I fight back, they get angrier and tell me i have no right to fight back.
I am told if I leave the house they will call the police. Anytime I want to go out, they threaten to change the locks and destroy my property.
I work occassionally, doing small freelance work….half the time i can't make my deadlines because they won't allow me to work. I had to turn a job down this last friday because they NEEDED me at home.
I am trying my best to cope but I am totally depressed. mY self worth is non-existant and I find myself losing interest in everything. it's not worth fighting them for a few hours of freedom.
I feel like i have been beaten down and there is no way out. I hate facing the days and stay up all night just so I can have a few sane hours.
I'm praying for you…prayer works trying praying and asking God for help and direction…PleaSE read my Blog. May God give more and more Mercy,peace and Joy.
Blessings to you
i know your self worth is WORTH fighting for so please please don't give up. if you don't stand up for yourself they will only bully you more because they know how to get to you. i hope one day they will realise that it is they who are dependent on you and it is the kindness of your heart which is keeping them from a rest home. my thoughts and prayers are with you *hugs*
I too take care of my very ill parents and the one things I've learned in their bullying is that I'm the last thing in life they have to hold onto and don't want to let go at any price. I have a feeling yours are doing the same, they have nothing left but you and they will do whatever works not to lose you but it's sad they chose to beat you down with ugly words instead of hugs which I would love to have myself. One day they will be gone and you can assure yourself you did everything a daughter could do for them in the end. You should be proud of yourself and know in their own weird way they probably love you too honey. Say a little prayer and the answer will come….things always happen for a reason and you'll find that reason soon.