I live with my aunt and all my life she has been extremely inconsiderate to other people…..She has two sides to her..an overly giving side..and then a side that is a "i don't give a bleep attitude"…My aunt has to overdo everything..Everything has to be loud..Everything has to be her way…She has a very dominating personality..People have to walk on eggshells around her and always do what she wishes…even if its making them unhappy…My aunt now is hard of hearing…and I can respect that she can't hear certain things…but I received this game system for my birthday last year..a Nintendo DS…and I don't think I've had the game in my hands long enough to breathe on it..She is like addicted to a game that my friend got me for my birthday..and she will be playing the game for days and days..and for hours and hours…I know that I'm an adult..but this was the first birthday I had without my mom since she passed..and I felt so alone without my mom..Nobody got me anything for my birthday but my bestfriend…and that one thing meant something to me …This particular game that my aunt loves..she will turn up the volume to the highest level..and when I tell her how loud it is, she thinks that I'm crazy..I have to go in my room and close the door tight..I have to turn up my tv when I'm in the living room…I have to go into my room to hear my music..I feel like I'm letting her walk all over me..and I would go outside more..but my anxiety problems are so bad that I can't stay outside that long anymore..Its not about the game..its about being considerate…

 

Another thing that happens from time to time is that my aunt likes to wear very loud perfume..I say "loud" because the perfume is so strong that it should have a volume on it and probably an address..lol…I have asthma and allergies..I can't wear any perfume unless its something super light like Vanilla or something that is light as air..lol…I told my aunt about this perfume that she loves so much..and how it starts up my asthma…She didn't care..she would put it on..like everyday..it was like a perfume lotion…I would be in my room wheezing..and I would have to turn on my air conditioner and I would have to take my asthma medicine…All my life I have let people walk all over me..even family..especially family..but I am not as soft as I used to be…I honestly feel like I'm going to snap if someone even looks at me wrong…

 

I need to do something about my anxiety or else I will be stuck in my house with my aunt..probably banging my head on a wall or something..lol..hahahha..no I don't really bang my head on walls..I will blog again about my anxiety in a few minutes or so…I just don't know what to do about my aunt..The apartment I live in used to have like many of my family members all living in one apartment..and certain people decided to move out because of my aunt…because she wouldn't let my cousins live their lives..she tried to dominate my mom when she was alive…she even tries to dominate my uncle…Even though I am Catholic and I believe in God more than I believe in most people..I do fornicate..and the thing is that I will get intimate with my boyfriend..but when I would want to stay at his house…my aunt would throw up her beliefs in my face (she is like a deep Christian..even though she can be a mean individual from time to time)..She would say to me that I was disrespecting her by sleeping over at my boyfriend's house..If she disagrees with something deeply..she will phone everyone in my family and turn things around and make it sound like I'm the damn devil..I am a grown ass woman…I remember when I first started getting intimate for the first time with someone ..and my aunt told my whole family because I was about to stay overnight at his house..and I had relatives calling my cellphone…I think one of the worst things my aunt ever did was go through my mom's mail and hid certain things from her that were from a man..Honestly I can't keep going on and on about my aunt right now…because then I'll just start getting more upset…tc everybody and I hope I'm not too tired to write a blog about my anxiety issues..Luv Ya…

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