The time now is almost 6p.m..Need to get a fresh pack soon.Been smoking like a chimney.The unbearable chest pain is as painful as my heart bleeds right now…Angels…if ur reading this ofter one year of patient and waiting i finally ended my relationship with the one that i thought i would be spending the rest of my life with..

It did not went well…we were cursing and shouting at each other.I wish we could have settle it in a better manner but i guess it was to much for me n mybe her to keep inside.

She blamed me for not being patient enough…Have i not been patient?..have i not given her enough time…?

I really dont know how i feel right now…but i do feel i regret my action..why do i feel this way? Have i not being patient with her..have i not been there for her..? I gave her everything.

I prayed to me..give me a sign…but all the sign if there is any …is unclear..Does she needs more time to let go of her fiancee or more time to decide who she wants to be with …How long does she wants me to wait for her…and when the time comes..will it be i’m yours…or so sorry i cannot be with you..

Oh my god…i really dont know what to do ..or what i’m thinking right now..Did not go to work today..Thats gonna cost me…but i just cant face my staff and my client when i am in this situation…

Why does things have to be so complicated…why do i find it so hard to let go..why cant she see that i love her..why cant she admit that she’s is wrong..why cant she just make up her mind who she wants to be with…?

why do i feel so hard to let go..why do i keep repeating myself.Guess i’m going crazy …

Dear God..

i ask u pls…give me strength to face this me ur broken mortal to rise up n survive this worst moment of my life..

Depression Tribe..Thank you for being here…Thank you for listening..

1 Comment
  1. Author
    angels5888 14 years ago

    omg, mortal, finally, i prayed for u soo hard, that you would do this, yes it is hard, very hard, but my god, how long should you wait ???? 2yrs 20yrs, anyone else would haven thrown in the towel by now, you have given her, more time than she deserved,much more, if i did that to someone, u can bet they wont take it for very long, and i think she is mad becux, she lost her money ticket and control on you, now comes the guilt trip she is putting on you, pls dont fall for that too, you deserve a whole lot better, i dont like when ppl take advantage of my friends, and that is what she was doing, and you know in your heart and head that is true, luv you lots hon, be strong, as i know you can be, this too will pass, i will still continue to pray for you

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