I don't know what's wrong with me, my mood just suddenly dropped through the floor. I guess I've had a pretty hectic day but I thought I was handling it okay. And then I got to my Graphic Novels class and sorta just cracked. I got my journal grade back and it was a miserable 6.5/10. The first two were 10/10 so it isn't like that just wrecked my grade but it bugged me. And then the professor joked, "Make sure that you don't leave your name off your journal…like [my name] did." I looked back and he was laughing/smiling at me so I brushed it off. Then, a few minutes later, he said that we were going to discuss the book we were reading but "no bitching…[my name…]" Again, it was jokingly said but then I started to wonder.

On my way back to my car, my head started hurting again and I nearly started to cry. I almost started crying in the car and when I pulled into the hotel parking lot, that's when the tears began to drop. As soon as I was safe in my room, I just let it all loose.

I have so much work to do and I'm worried that I won't have time to do it all. My head hurts because I'm tired and I'm tired because I keep having weird dreams that make me toss and turn. Nothing serious but just weird stuff like I left some food out one night and some ants got in it. No big deal, just a mistake, right? Well, that night, I dreamt that something – I now forget what – was full of ants and maggots and I had to try to get rid of them all. They kept trying to scuttle away and hide and it just grossed me out big time. I also had a dream that my Database professor cancelled homework two because "no one will be able to do it". Unfortunately, it wasn't actually cancelled and I turned it in a week late. The professor said that it seemed like an "honest mistake" and to go ahead and turn it in, he'd give me credit for it anyways. The dream just felt so real that I found myself seriously having to ask about a due date.

I don't feel like it's depression but who knows. I think today was just a bad day although I don't know why. I didn't really begin to crack until 4:00pm, when Graphic Novels started. It was so peculiar, I don't get it at all.


Leave a reply

© 2021 WebTribes Inc. | find your tribe

Log in with your credentials


Forgot your details?

Create Account