I have many many many problems, just about all of which are emotional and social rather than physical. I haven't seen a doctor about anything like this so I can't say for certain that I'm actually depressed but based on the way I feel, I believe I am depressed. I believe I have some form of social anxiety, not sure the severity of it but it's there. It seems I've had all this for at least since high school, perhaps the social anxiety I've had long before then even, and I'm 24 now as of a few weeks ago. I'm at the point where I really am starting to TRY things to help fix this but nothing's working and though I'm not giving up completely I'm losing faith in everything that I'm doing. I'm also realizing that as I am getting older, everyone around me that's my age is moving forward with their lives but I'm basically standing still. But the one thing that's bothering me most of all that really brought my attention to all of this rather than be blissfully ignorant to it all, is the fact that I have never had a girlfriend, never been in any kind of romantic relationship and for the past year I've been on an online dating site with almost zero luck. I'm too shy to meet women in person and I feel like I'm much more comfortable talking to someone, especially perfect strangers, online. I have very few friends, none of which are female and none of which know any women that would be interested in me and so I just feel like online dating is my only option but the longer I go on with no luck, the longer I feel like I'm never going to find that "special someone" let alone my FIRST girlfriend, who wouldn't necessarily be the same person but you can't find your special someone without meeting your first, right? anyway I just feel like 24 is way too old to be just starting dating, 99% of people had some sort of dating experience in high school and I never did (which is a whole different story… ask me later…)… to be continued…
Depression… where to start?
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Its silly but It's still how I feel.
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