Currently feeling a bit anxious. I went on holiday last year with my friends and ever since then I've always wound myself about thoughts that I may or may have not had while I was out there. I feel the need to tell my boyfriend them even if I know they will upset him because I feel bad and guilty for even thinking them. I know it's normal for people to get thoughts of other people but somehow I can't just think it and let it go. I feel like the worst person in the world. I have literally told him every thought I may or may not of had on that holiday, but for some reason I'm getting anxiety about this certain thought because I can't remember if I thought it or not and I feel like he needs to know. I love my boyfriend more than anything, he's my world (cringe to hear but it's so true) he's literally been a god send throughout the whole 2 years of me struggling with OCD and its just made us stronger as a couple. He loves me unconditionally and it breaks my heart when I say stuff to him but I find it so hard not to. I'm not a bad person, I'm completely normal and completely inlove with this boy, I just can't help but beat myself up about my thoughts. If I can't remember if I've told him or not (which is stupid cos you can't remember everything you've ever said so I don't know why I try so hard) I panic and that's when the anxiety starts. I am so lucky to have such amazing people around me and I love them all dearly. It breaks my heart to put so much on them… I don't know what to do about this thought in my head right now. Do I don't I tell him. I can't be myself around him if I don't but if I do I feel like its a step back and I've upset them. It's so difficult


Leave a reply

© 2021 WebTribes Inc. | find your tribe

Log in with your credentials


Forgot your details?

Create Account