How do you cope with someone who constantly wants to nit pick?  When you are with someone and you love them so much that it seems they are going back to their old self.  It seems that way with my husband.  I have thought and thought how can I do any thing right if all he wants to nit pick.  At least that is what it feels like.  It seems no matter if I am on the computer 10 minutes or 5 minutes all he wants to do is fight about it.  I am doing all that I can what more can I do? If he wants me to be perfect he is asking too much of me.  This time last year he was so hard to live with.  It was all about him, if it didnt please him it was HELL on me and my kids.  I want to so much to focus on my son, but it seems like if I dont please him the harder he is on me.  Dont get me wrong he does work and works hard and I really appreciate that, but I cant live with this anymore.  How much more can a person take.  I am so scared of living by myself.  I know that I could go home to my parents, but who wants to go home at the age of 34 with a 15 year old son and a 9 year old daughter.  How do I talk to him to get him out of the old person he was a year ago to the person I think he should be?  Do I just say hey either you get a grip on yourself or there will be BIG PROBLEMS.  I love him so much it hurts, but I survived once before I guess I could again.  My son is so fed up I can tell with his stepdad and his father.  Now since his father and his stepmom have gotten back together he hasnt heard a word from his natural father.  He is so hurt I can tell and I am so tempted to call his natural father and say WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON WITH YOU??  My son doesnt want me too he says that if he wants to talk to me he can call me.  He says he is going to leave him alone and not worry about it.  I just want my son to have both a mother and a father he can depend on.  He knows that he can depend on me, but his natural father I just dont know.  When he came back 2 weeks ago begging our son for another chance I thought well maybe he has changed since he tried to kill himself.  Maybe he took a look at himself and saw that he wanted to make things right between himself and our son.  Well we havent heard a word from him since last sunday.  I ask  my son are you going next weekend to your dad and stepmom's house and he just says (with a look of dread on his face) I dont know.  I dont want to make him go so I told him if he doesnt go he has to tell his father why.  He says he feels like his stepmom is his older sister.  His father and her got together when she was just 17 and he was 30.  Our son got real hurt over that.  I told my son well I am 4 years older than you stepdad and he said that is just 4 years not 14.  I just dont know what to do anymore about my husband or my son.  My husband says that I dont NEVER spend enought time with him like I used to.  I told him I am NOT THE SAME PERSON.  I have an illness now and it is going to take ALOT for me to  adjust to medicine and trying to do therapy the best that I know how.  He says that this so called online therapy isnt helping me none and I should just do what he does live day in and day out.  I cant do that I am not like him I am a totally different person and how in the HELL are you suppose to cope if you dont have some sort of therapy.  My doctor said that this online therapy is great for me because I am the type of person that doesnt like going to groups.  My husband said well that JACKASS  doesnt know nothing.  I said come on he is a DOCTOR he knows more than you or me.  He know how to diagnose depression and my husband needs to get a  GRIP before the door hits him in the ASS.  He also needs to learn that I am not him and he isnt me.  I have different ways of coping with things now and if he cant accept it then he cant accept me.  I am so different than the way I was before.  Come on I was diganosed with depression and I have to learn to cope with it the best way that I can.  I just wished he would accept me for who I am now and not for who I was 6 months ago or even a year ago.  I will just have to tell him how I feel and if he gets mad so be it.  The only thing I know to do is to say I love  you so very much, I appreciate that you work as hard as you do and I have never had that before but I have to tell you something.  I have thought and thought and this is my conclusion.  Does anyone have any advice for me?


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