How many times have I sat through his stupid family functions, simply because he asked me to accompany him?
How many times have I spent my vacation time with his family, simply because he asked for my company? Lord knows hanging out with his nutty mother, super-crabby uncle, or super-trashy aunt are not my ideas of fun.
How many times have I sat in a corner at his friends' parties, watching him ignoring me? Pretty sad when his friend Nathan talks to me more than he does.
How many times have I agreed to sit home and watch the kid so he could hang out with his friends?
So why is it that the one time I ask him to return on the many favors I've given him, and be my date at my firm's holiday party, he flat-out refuses? He claims "you know I don't do Holiday parties". So what. It's not about the holiday party. It's about me asking him to spend time with me and him refusing. And it's not even like I'm asking him to spend money – the food AND drinks are free!! And yes, the kiddo will have to come with us and stay up a little past his bedtime, but we can also use that as an excuse to politely duck out early.
I did consider taking the kiddo with me and leaving hubby at home alone, but he'd like it too much. He'd spend his night playing his latest video game addiction.
So, I won't go to this year's holiday party. And this isn't really about the stupid party anyway. I've been here almost 7 years – the novelty of such things long ago wore off. No, my point is that I'm pissed as hell that my hubby refuses to man-up and spend a few hours of one night doing something for me, no matter how many times I've had to suck it up to spend much more time doing something for him.
This year, I'm going to stay home and make the turd play board games with me and our son. Kismet (a dice game sort of like Yahtzee) is as good a Friday night passtime as any.Hubby will hateit, but I no longer give a crap. When Ithink of how many of our outings turned into him hanging out with his buddies… when I think of how many of my vacations turned into me listening to "friendly" advise fromhis nutty mom…no, hecan suffera night ofKismet with his wife and son. And if he complains even once, he's free to dowhat he wants the rest of the night… and I won't put out for him until 2011.
I just read your post and it seems to me that you have been allowing him to go and do what ever he wants to do because he knows that you will follow the program that he has set for you . put your foot down and start changing things around he probably is so use to the ways things have been that he just may not be aware of your needs and feelings let him know just put it out there for him to hear and draw a line in the sand it will give him food for thought and he will start to think about you if he thinks that your behavior has changed somewhat he will try and make it better for you. these guys just are not mind readers let him know how your feel and where you stand.
happy holidays p.s i would go to the party anyways even it its for a few hours if he sees that you are willing to go without him he would think twice.