So it's been a while since I've gotten on here. I thought I should just pop in and say that I am honestly doing all right. There have been several times when everything explosed on me and I just started to cry but… overall I am good. I am glad to say that the mourning period (at least that intense mourning period where you miss the person every day and you can't stop thinking about them) is over. I still think about her quite often but there are times when I can just think about other things, as if everything was exactly the same. I know in the end it is not but I don't really feel like she has left me. I still feel like she is watching over me, edging me to do great things.

I have temporarily solved the issue with my mother. 🙂 Though I do feel kind of guilty about it caues now she's starting to complain. BUT here lately I've been going over to my grandparents house every weekend to get away from her and her bf and occasionaly his kids. I am at my grandparents right now, writing this blog… at 9 in the morning. haha. The only bad thing about coming over here is the fact that I wake up at 7, and sometime 6, in the morning. That is so early for me! Though I usually finish breakfast and a shower before 8 o'clock even comes around. It is nice to feel like I haven't wasted the whole day on sleeping. Plus whenever I am over here it's like a vacation. They have this big house with this big yard. They have a magnificent camera that I can use to take my pictures. They have their dog, Buckeye, and the kitty, Spooky. I love Spooky. He's kind of like me but so much more messed up. lol. He was found in a dumpster as a kitten. My grandparents adopted him. Though he so withdrawn from everyone. He doesn't really like to be pet or picked up. He gets scaried really easily. Though I am proud to say that I am the ultimate cat whisperer!!! He's still a little skittish around me but not nearly as much as he was. I can pet him basically whenever I like, unless he' in a mood. As long as I go slow and try not to scare him. I pick him up all the time (that's short lived though. He is not fond of being pickupmost of the time). He sleeps with me most of the time now and last night he was hangin' with me while I was reading my book (50 Shades of Grey!!! Oh so deliciously good!!! I am almost done with it and I just started yesterday!!! 🙂 )

Though I am kind of stuck with a dilema but it could honestly wait. The delima (if you want to call it that) is the fact that my grandparents honestly want me to move out here with them. They both know about my depression and everything that goes on at home (I don't keep anything from them). So they are always edging me to move out here. Let me tell you one simple fact: I love coming out here. I don't feel depressed when I'm out here. I can just leave all of my problems back at home and not think about a single one of them whenever I am here. They are always keeping me involved whenever I am over here which is just so different from what I deal with at home. At home I am in my room 24/7 and out here the only time I am in 'my' room is when I am sleeping. I don't have time to be in my room whenever I am out here and with company like my grandparents, I don't want to be in my room.

The couple of problems that I have though is two simple facts: my school and my bf. Though one of the problems may be moot here soon. I like my school and all that it has to offer. I started a biomed class when I was a freshman and I told myself that I would continue it until I graduate. They don't offer it out here in the country *country accent* (lol). Plus all of my friends are over at home (I know I could always make new ones but… i don't know). My bf may become moot here soon. Don't start freaking out on me, we are not breaking up. Though he may be moving in with his dad… Which is like 20 to 30 minutes away frommy real home as opposed to the walking distance he is now. Plus, he tells me all the time that I should move out here anyways… He knows everything that goes on at home and wants me to get out of there fast… I just don't want to leave him behind…

Anyways, grandpa is waiting for me to go to home depot right about now so I must say farewell my lovelies. I shall speak at y'all later and thank you for reading my blog 🙂


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