Life is a funny thing. You try so hard to fit it.. but why? To live up to others standards is not a life at all. I dont know whats more infuriating..trying to fit in or not fitting in? Your looks arent pretty enough. Your not in enough extracurricular activites. When is it enough? My name Brittany and im a Freshie in high school. Im turning 15 in May, Im a volleyball player and thats all what life seems to be about nowadays. I hang out with a lot of people, have guy friends all of that. My grades are lacking in some areas. I really just am not happy anymore. A girl from a different high school commited suicide a month or so ago and she had everything, pretty, cute boyfriend, grades, varsity sports, and she was only a Sophmore. It really hit me hard. You could have everything but not be happy. Noone knew what her life was at home. And that was the problem. I never ever let the thought or suicide cross my mind. I know I have far too left in life. I can be strong and pull through the hard times. I was a love child which by definition it means my parents were never married when they had me. They went to court and did all the custody battles, I was around 6 when I first noticed though. You start to get curious. Why isnt mommy not here? Why do I only see her on the weekends? These are the questions I wish I never asked. I guess I wouldnt have been able to avoid it, obviously. The first time I remember something scary happening was in about 4th grade my friend Steph was over and my room has the window peering out into the front yard. I heard an awful yelling. It was my mom. "I WANT TO SEE MY DAUGHTER, NOW!" is what I kept hearing over and over. I looked out the window and my mom and dad were out infront yelling and screaming. I remember looking at Steph and I didnt even know what my own parents were arguing about. Thats when the police came.

My mom and dad must really love putting on such a show.</3


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