Hey!

So it's been a long time since I last visited depressiontribe. But I'm in need of some help. The last time I came on here back in 2008 I was at my lowest but some how managed to get my act together and move abroad to teach! I was there for 2 years. I wasn't totally happy but I didn't feel depressed at any point. I just felt like a normal person with normal levels of stress, anxiety, sadness etc.

The last 3 months I was abroad I had started chatting to guy from my hometown that I had ever met. He was a friend of a friend. In time we grew very close I dont think there was a single day we didn't talk for the whole 3 months 🙂 The day I flew home was the day we met. We have been together ever since almost a year in June. So as you can tell my life is pretty good right now. I'm even starting uni in September. My boyfriend is also at uni part-time studying to be an accountant.

In the day time he works for his Dad at his shop. This is were my issue begins… He has been working there since I arrived back in the UK. Infact the shop had just opened. He works very hard for his dad for minimum wage. He even does his accounts for him with no extra charge.

As you all probably well know its not a good idea to work with family . He also still lives at home, so he is with his dad all day at work then at home at night. His dad is very strong minded and stubborn so what he's says goes. There have been a few times where his dad has sacked him or my boyfriend has quit but they have usually sorted it and got back on with it.

The past few weeks has been increasingly hard for my boyfriend to work with his dad. And yesterday they came to blows. Which resulted in my boyfriend quitting again. But this time its different. My boyfriend has been suffering with which I believe to be depression, as a long time sufferer myself I know the signs and symptons. He has been talking about how he would prefer to be dead and I'm soooo worried about him.

I have finally heard from him just now since 6pm yesterday… all he can bring himself to message me is ''hey, I'm not going to be getting out of bed today, too depressed' It's killing me inside to know he is hurting and feels so down.

I remember feeling that incredibly low but the thing is I don't know how to deal with him feeling this way. I was awake from 7 this morning just crying… I am finding it very hard to hold myself together at work. I feel bad for not knowing how to cope with this. And I feel selfish for letting my own feelings get the better of me when I should be trying to support him! But in all honesty I dont know how to?! I need help.

I'm scared he is going to push me away and then I will be alone and depressed all over again. I am strong enough to think positively but it's getting very difficult to hold myself together.

Any suggestions and advice is very welcome.

Thank you for taking the time to read this x

2 Comments
  1. chechaye 10 years ago

    Hey Simi,

     

    Thank you so much for your reply! 🙂

    I managed to get a phonecall with him on my lunch break and I'm feeling less anxious and stressed out now. He has asked if he could stay at mine for a while just while he sorts his head out. I'm glad he has asked as atleast now I can keep an eye on him and try and help him through it. 

    He also mentioned how speaking to me has put a little smile on his face! Which made me in turn smile. He no doubt will have more bad and dark days to come but I feel I can handle it better if he's with me (Not sure if that makes sense lol)

    Again thank you for caring enough to message me 🙂 x

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  2. cleopardi 10 years ago

    maybe he is just going through a phase.  he could be depressed and it could pass in a couple of days.  does not mean he will have a major depression.  U have to look out for urself.  Its hard to watch the ones u care about hurt, nothing but u can do but be there for him.  U have to be strong for urself so u don't slip back into  a depression.  I hope everything works out for u.  cindy

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