I'm still here, I just thought I hadn't had any comments in the past… 3 months or so. Damn no-alerts *kicks*

Meh, what do I have to say anyway besides how petty my miserable existence is? Yes, I'm here in full force. Ha. Don't touch me, I know you're scared.

What can I say? This is my prison. This is my life sentence. No matter how much medication they throw at me, nothing's gonna change my world. Doctors don't wanna look at the underlying problem, they just wanna make money off the results. Thanks for helping me live a fulfilling life.

I'd also prefer to never have existed than be abandoned or to never feel feelings returned. I am disconnected from all, unapproachable and unacceptable for anyone. A mute freak. Tell me you wouldn't approach a mute freak in real life let alone try staying around for the long haul. If you did, you'd have to leave too.  Meh, not like I have anyone to talk to online either.

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls go by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

I see a line of cars and they're all painted black
With flowers and my love both never to come back
I see people turn their heads and quickly look away
Like a new born baby it just happens every day

I look inside myself and see my heart is black
I see my red door and must have it painted black
Maybe then I'll fade away and not have to face the facts
It's not easy facin' up when your whole world is black

No more will my green sea go turn a deeper blue
I could not foresee this thing happening to you

If I look hard enough into the settin' sun
My love will laugh with me before the mornin' comes

I see a red door and I want it painted black
No colors anymore I want them to turn black
I see the girls go by dressed in their summer clothes
I have to turn my head until my darkness goes

Hmm, hmm, hmm,…

I wanna see your face, painted black
Black as night, black as coal
I wanna see the sun blotted out from the sky
I wanna see it painted, painted, painted, painted black
Yeah!

Aha, Aha, Aha, …