ok so i havent posted anything for a while and havent done any polls either…i could blame it on my being busy in school or lazieness or my frustration at the inconclusive evidence in the search for D.B. Cooper or anything..point is….i forgot….anyway i'm posting or polling or ranting…all in one…like a burrito…yeah…its like a DT burrito…awesome…i rock! ok….anyway what im gonna bore you with is this…ive always tried to work out all my life…lifted weights for years…swam the mile..etc…not like i'm a jock or anything…i just want to be in some kind of shape…i prefer octagon…anyway i havent really worked out steady for the past few years…not even gonna try and blame it on anything…but ive put on weight…i still dont look too much different then my pictures so i guess i shouldnt complain…but i can see the added weight…so ive been working out every day for the past month…yes i know it takes awhile…but im eating nothing but high protein low fat with high fiber and vegatables…im not starving myself on the things i need but im not eating anything that isnt low fat…i know how to eat right so im not running that fad diet deal..its all healthy…im doing 45-hour cardio a day plus strength training…im not doggin it…i started doing hill climbs every day and now im on incline treadmill…its not happening fast enough…i know it takes time…i guess the real thing im saying is…i miss eating…i miss food..im hungry all the time…im eating enough for the workouts…its not like im starving myself…but im still hungry…salads tuna whole wheat vegatables…no dairy no cake no candy no pop…im eating healthy…but im starving…like all the time…im eating enough calories…but im always hungry…and i miss all the stuff….why am i doing this…why shouldnt i just be fat…and dont tell me moderation…it doesnt work…i eat one cookie im 200 pounds over even if im working out…either i dont eat anything good or i give up and be fat…does it matter…not like im gonna find someone even if im buff…i realized a little while back…im addicted to food…i mean like other people on crack….god i miss ice cream…pasta…doritos…wow im rambling….sorry…ok im gonna go eat a tofu popsicle and then stab myself in the heart with the stick…thumper
Related Articles
-
The golden flower
Along comes a girl with tears streaming down her face, The world had treated her badly like she was...
-
random things that i think
I built a gate to isolate myself against the wind i used to think that one day i’d open...
-
-
Drained
Let’s start this off again. Today I had lunch with my grandparents and they’re the type of people who...
-
-
A Momentary Reversal of Stability
Feeling weary, right now… things are peaceful with Charlie. No more certain, but at least I got some confirmation...
-
Giving up/ Enough is Enough
I been battling depression since i was 6 years old I am now 35. It' shard to stay positive...
-
I’m trying
So it’s a new day. I can’t remember much of last night. I know something happened with my ptsd...
.jpeg)
0 Comments
