Hiya, all. I found out 30/8/06 that I’m pregnant! Big shock. My fella did not handle the news well and went into panic over-drive – especially as I would not consider abortion as an option. He’s cool now though. Really scared me to death, and I nearly left him last Friday night, but I didn’t want to and he wouldn’t let me so we talked sense into each other instead. I feel more normal now than I did three days ago – then I was utterly devastated that my fellas so-called freind Lawrence thought it was ok to hand out crap relationship advice – this froma 21 year old whose own love life has been an agony to him for the last three years. Implying that I’d use the baby to emotionally blk-mail my fella into staying with me, that our relationship would never last, that abortion was the only answer and that my fella ought to demand it or do a runner… My boyfreind has never agreed with abortion. He was so scared at the thought of so unexpectadly becoming a dad that this ‘advice’ got to him and made him more worried. I myself have been sick with worry all week, and very depressed and worn-out as a result. I almost called a day on our relationship, just because if he wobbles at this then how’s he going to cope with other challenges life throws at us? It’s still a worry, but I love him too much to give him up that easily. And he has been an absolute darling the last two days – it’s like a miraculous transformation came over him. I know he’s still scared, but he’s able to discuss his fears calmly and seriously with me now, which is much better.
Anyway, I had a couple of anxiety attacks and my sleeping patterns are completely screwed up at the moment, but otherwise, things are much better. I hope everyone else out there is feeling ok. I’m always here if you need to talk – i’ve been through alot of shit for a 23 yr old, and I’ve come out of it sane (though eccentric! (: )
so I like to think I’m a good person to turn to. Anyway, wrtie ya’ll soon, folks! BD