Recently got in touch with a family member who I haven't spoken to in several years due to my dad & his sister not getting along so it would be my aunt that I am taking to again! I have been told my whole life that she is crazy but after finding out some things recently I understand why she used drugs,alcohol, & other ways to cope that does not mean I condone it just saying it makes more sense to me now. Anyway this has been causing much stress because I can't let my parents know I am talking to her or they would flip out so sneaking around,deleting her number as soon as I hang up stuff like that which is hard on me because I am not used to lying to my parents & don't feel good about it but still want a relationship with my aunt at the same time!!! It started out well she was supportive & kind but the last 2 phone calls have been stuff about my dad which granted I figured he did but it is things that happened 10 years ago or more now so their is no point in bringing it up now! She seems to love throwing dirt on anyone she can. I live with my parents still due to health issues so it makes it incredibly hard to look at him with all this new knowledge i have :(. He is just a total hypocrite which is 1 think I seriously hate in people at least be honest about who u are!!! It has gotten so bad that when I see her number come up on my phone I start shaking violently & can barely hold the phone from shaking so much! I am frustrated that she will not obey my boundaries or see how much this is affecting me in a bad way…I feel responsible though because I was the 1 who contacted her again so saying get out seems rude but at the same time I have enough on my plate at the same time without her crap!!!!! Also she talks crap about my grandma to me constantly & calls her rude names although they both do that. I am tired of being in the middle of it all they both call me as soon as they hang up with the other 1 & then I have to decide which 1 to talk to & which 1 to ignore…ignoring either of them has serious consequences to it!!! Feeling as though I just want to get a new family and start over…or at the very least divorce the family I have right now! I am scared to know about any more of the skeletons in are family closet!!!!!!!!
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I am sorry you have to go through this 🙁 So many times I have wished for a different family as well, but unfortunately we can\'t choose them. I agree that you will just have to be very clear about where your boundaries lie and if someone steps over them, then just take the appropriate measures (whatever you think is appropriate). Hang in there and try to stay positive!