hi. im not sure of what to start writing. tonight i feel like it is the beginning of the very last week of my life. my day started out in tears and have had thoughts of how to sell my things, and cause embarrassment? to my daughter. i don t feel like walking in front of the semi but just want to go away. maybe to give you some insight about me i should start with……. this past january i was evicted from my forever home, a week after moving out our area had a horrible ice storm and i fell and broke my ankle in two places and other damage to my foot. my first broken bone in 60 years. long story short i have been sleeping on my daughters couch ever since and now that it is the 1st of june its time to go. i found a neat apartment, and most of my stuff is there, sstill need to get the utilities in my name and i am so afraid to move. i have been an independent soul for all my life and now i am so scared that i cant do it (life) on my own any more. the embarassment to my daughter…i am a pack rat and have kept items from loved ones that have passed on which she could care less about. she never met my mother or grandfather, there are no pictures of my family or me in her house. many times she has said she will just get rid of every thing and i believe her. she has a family of her own, a good husband, and three beautiful girls. she recently got a job and its taking a toll on the girls.their dad was a semi truck driver but hurt his back and hasnt worked for almost a year. he s tyring to be a mr mom.. but now im back wandering. sorry . i feel a bit better now perhaps a journal will be helpful thanks for listening dianna

1 Comment
  1. dleley35 11 years ago

    no matter where you go, there you are…that has so much meaning.  you can run you can hide  you can not escape you.  a person  could learn so much from those few words.  life continues as it does, and we flounder and grasp at straws when all we need to do is be honest enough with ourselves and know it isn't just about us. our actions become reactions and must in someway be dealt with.  some of us just dont want to, or can't or are so afraid of tomorrow and the repercussions.  we hurt, not just ourselves,, but those close to us without trying,and  the medications are not the cure, they help, yes,  but we have to heal ourselves for ourselves and have hope, faith and believe in our Creator, whoever you believe Him to be,some days may be more difficult or painful, some days may be really good.,we need to be thankful for all.  i'm sorry, i took your message and just started to ramble,  thank you 

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