Yesterday we got an invitation to go up to my son, B, and daughter-in law\'s, A. today. We were spos\'d to be there at 11:30, so we assumed we were going for lunch. I was really looking forward to spending some time with them and the grandkids (5 & 7 weeks). Didn\'t even stress ahead of time about going (as I usually do when we are going almost anywhere). When we got there, it was real apparent that A. was not in a good mood and really kind of ignoring us. They were working on their yard and patio, so we played with the kids for a while and it didn\'t take long to realize that there was no lunch, they just kept doing their thing, and my granddaughter had a birthday party to go to at 1:30. A. and I have had issues in the past but it seems like everything is fine now. Except today when we were there she was very moody and really kind of ignored us. I didn\'t know what to think – had I done something wrong again? So at 1:00 A. put the baby down for a nap and said she was taking Madi to the party. I guess we misunderstood the whole affair – but I can\'t stop feeling like I must have done something wrong. Not to just blame her, B is at fault too – sometimes I just don\'t understand those two. They are very, very close with her family, spend almost all of the holidays with them and we are always trying to reaarange things for another day so that we can spend holiday time with them and our grandkids. I really hate always feeling like 2nd fiddle, and I keep trying to figure out ways to improve the situation so that I don\'t always end up feeling so disappointed. It\'s not like this with my other son – we get along great with he and his wife, and even spend time with her family. I guess after 7 years, I should get the picture that it will never be that way with them. . . Can\'t wait til my daughter is in Chicago – we are so close and I always know that I can depend on her and I am so happy that we will be able to spend more time together. My husband felt pretty much the same about the way the day went, but he told me that I just have to try not to expect so much when it comes to B & A. They just aren\'t as family oriented as the other kids, and they don\'t keep us from seeing our grandkids often. I guess I\'ve just spent so much time and so many tears trying to make us closer, and I have a hard time with the fact that it is not my decision to make. This has always been a trigger point for my anxiety as well as my depression, and I don\'t want to let this one day bring me down again. Sorry for whining – I\'m feeling sorry for myself, and i hate that. Thanks for listening, just need to get my feelings out sometimes. Hope you all had a good day, and I hope that we all have a better one tomorrow! M.
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