HAHAHA! I am back, sorry I haven’t updated in a while, I was fighting the dark lord- nah. School was being a dick and I’ve been really busy but hey, I’m back. Yes. As some of you may know, I identify with the LGBT+ community. I am a genderfluid pansexual human, and yes I am catholic. Let’s stop talking about now and talk about back then. I WAS a confused little 11(or 12) year old, I really didn’t know what I felt- I mean I was a girl but I really didn’t feel like one (nor did I feel like a boy either). Throughout my early teen years I spent time trying to solve the year old mystery, “What am I?” You may be wondering, “You’re Catholic and you’re LGBT+?” Yes.

I supported LGBT+ rights and all that when I was about 10, I wouldn’t call myself an LGBT+ advocate- I support many groups other than LGBT+- I’m a human rights activist. I was smart enough to see people as human beings no matter what their preference was, no matter how many bodies they had (by bodies I mean if the person was born one sex but wants to change their sex[transgenders]- and nonbinaries) It didn’t matter if you liked boys, girls, both, no one, all, or you’re just really anti-social. To me you were human, I supported people of different ethnic backgrounds, different religions, and all that. Humans are humans, unless they treat other life as garbage. If you kill, maim, humiliate, and make life harder for certain people- then you are considered not human.

Back to the fact that I was a confused nugget, I really didn’t know what to do, I had no one to confide in besides the internet and music. There were times in my preteens I wanted my body to be less curvy, you know how most female bodies have that hourglass shape? I wanted my body to have less of that, I wanted to have a more masculine body at times or to just hide all of my physical features. Now, ladies you may understand this (and men you can listen in on this too but be warned), as a female grows older, her body changes. I started developing boobs like any girl would at that age, I was giving a training bra which kind of made me a bit more comfortable about my body because my chest looked more flat (more like a dude’s pectorals) and I continued wearing training and sports bras more often. As time past I had to switch to an actual female under garment- and actual bra. I felt increasingly uncomfortable in this, for many reasons, (I found out later that this was called gender dysphoria) I mean yes the bra was uncomfortable but me being a confused child really didn’t want to have those feminine features at times. I mean heck yeah bras were attractive (especially seen on other females [I am so sorry I am a pervert at times] and plus the designs some bras have are beautiful) but other times I wished, I prayed, that I had no boobs at times.

That’s just a little confusion story about little me (hahaha big me is still a bit confused but is happy with the me now). Hope all you confused jelly beans do your best, I know you can get through the maze of life.


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