I don't know how I got here. So I can't figure out how to ge back out. in the last year. My husband has been physically abusive. Slammed me into couches, boken my toes, broken countless things in our house. All in an effort to control me and stop me from leavinghim, becaus he was cheating. Finally it escalated to him pulling a gun on me and then firing it. The judge downgraded his charges of a felon in possession of a firearm to improper exibition of a firearm and he also downgraded aggravated assault to simple assault. He was arrested in Feb of 09' for domestic violence. He spent 30 days in jail with a year probation. He is already a convicted felon on state probation. This is the second time he hsa been arrested for hurting me and they just let him wal k away from it all. He got time serrved (which was 4 months) for the assault on me and then he got 1129 for the other charge and for violation his probation for the second time. I filed for divorce but he is fighting me on the divorce. He wants me to give him a second chance and let him come home.. He is refusing to sign the paperwork and dragging the divorce out. I am terrified of him. He will be getting out in AprilMay of this year. I know he will be back. I jump at every noise. I cry at night every night. I have night mares and that is when I can sleep. The judicial system just basically told him that what he did was ok. and that what he did to mme didn't matter enought o punish him. I have suffered through this for 3 yrs. I am terrified. Now I can explain it al laway and tell myself that he is in jail and it's ok, but I am terrified of the day he ges ot. Last time he got out the officer brought him by to pick up some of his pesonal things and he talked the officer into letting him go into the house with me alone and he talked me back into taking him back. My mom just down lays my fears and I don't know if it is because she is terrified too and doesn't want to make me feel worse or if she really oesn't believe me. but she doesn't know him like I do. I am terrifed of what he will do when he gets out.mHe has no conscience and isn't afraid to go to jail again cause he truly believes that he will always get out of it. Thankfully the harrassment from his family has subsided. They terroized me for months telling me it wsas my fault that he did what he did and I should have just let the violence and cheating go. I don't know what to do. I am afraid to talk to councelors, I am terrified of talking about it to othes. I go home and stay by myself and I cry and I try to put on a happy face for everyone else. I also cut myself. The stress and anxiety get so bad that I cut. Mymom tells me that I am stupid for doing it. I think she is scared and doesn't know how to deal with it. Nobody does….