So!. My OCD isnt as bad these days, which is a huge relief. I had this crazy ritual where i'd spend like 10 or more minutes making sure every door and window downstairs in my home was locked and i'd recheck things like 5 times before i was good with it all. Now i can check things quickly and only once and be content with it which is progress.

 

Ive also broken my routine of how i do my hair, the routine consisted of how i'd comb my hair and how many times i'd comb it and how i'd actually part it. I put my hair up today and washed my hair while it was in a pony tail and even though that may seem ridiculous it kinda helped in not making my hair look how i usually make it look. I plan on doing this tomarow as well because it makes for a faster shower which is always good.

 

I start college in about 2 weeks and im so nervous but im so excited. The thing you guys dont know is i was homeschooled/ tutored whatever you wanna call it. Basically just had class at night for two hours 5 days a week and it was quite annoying being all alone in the house all the time. Im a very active person even though i dont seem like it like i love getting up early and love to be busy and so this will be awesome for me. Its only a few days a week for a few hours in the morning but its something totally better then sitting around doing nothing. Im excited to be around people my age and make friends.

 

Winter is slowly approaching and i couldnt be more upset!. I hate winter i absolutely love summer because i love swimming and doing bon fires and all that so winter is a no in my book. Winter also makes me extremely extremely anxious and im considering re-entering therapy because it triggers my number one fear in life: Nose bleeds. I cannot stand nose bleeds they make me shake because i get so freaked out and i cant move and i like hypervenalate so its pretty serious. I will totally need some therapy for sure. My fear of these nose bleeds definitely stems from the one i had when i was like ten it was a very long one like more then a hour long and thats all i'll say because its something im trying to erase from my memory for life.

 

Ive been feeling depressed but i know why, its because summers ending. I swear i should've been born on the west coast.

 

Im getting my wisdom tooth out friday and after i hope i will be okay enough to do stuff like go out shopping and stuff but if not i will be cooped up on my mac watching some one tree hill 🙂

 

 

1 Comment
  1. Dent838 7 years ago

    Hey Sunshine.

    Isn't it great when you can discover a way to cut down on some compulsion and still have it be ok in your mind?  Glad your showers and checking are better.

    I'm right there with you about summer.  My symptoms always get worse in the winter too.  All my energy just fizzles out.  West coast sounds pretty good to me too.

    Good luck with your tooth.  And with college too — those can be good times.  🙂

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