So yesterday (Sunday) was my ‘family birthday party’. I was looking forward to seeing my mom, stepdad, brother and old roommates from Tucson. I unfortunately had to also invite my grandparents because, they are family. My grandma is bad news for my anxiety. She’s ultra manipulative and passive aggressive and she breaks me down. So we met at a restaurant to have lunch and stuff. They all live in Tucson, I live in Phoenix so it’s about 2 hrs to get to where I live. My parents and brother got there a lil early, met at my house so we could chat a little without my grandma interfering. My roommates then got to the restaurant at 2 to meet up with us. We all sat down and then my grandparents came. As soon as she got there she was trying to pull me aside and ask me 101 questions. She asked if she could get my picture somewhere in the restaurant. I felt so uncomfortable (although I should be used to it by now with her). So I found this fountain somewhat out of the way of everyone else in the place to get it done. Then she says she doesn’t have a picture of me and my bf together. I tell her we can get it later, outside when we are leaving or something. I just wanted to sit down and be out of this spotlight she creates. So we eat and everything, they are at the opposite end of the table so I don’t have to deal with her bullshit really during the meal. Then came time for presents. I was sitting next to my mom and bf and then my brother came down and sat to the side of me and she came over and pushed right up between my mom and I. My mom told her that I’d wanted just a gift certificate to get some clothes for work so I assumed that’s what I’d be getting. But instead I got a bunch of crap. A little dog keychain, cheap little picture frame that says “shop till you drop” which isn’t very appropriate for me and a 10 dollar gift card for Victoria’s secret. I don’t even know what you can really get for 10 bucks there. Then a nail file that was “picked out special for me” when my biggest bad habit is biting my nails. So I got a bunch of stuff I’ll never use and will just take up space until I get rid of it basically. Meanwhile after opening each thing she has to explain it. Has to go into detail about how she got it, why, why she wrapped it with whatever paper it was. It is very tedious. Then when I opened all the presents from my mom and old roommates she kept asking, oh what’s that, where’d u get it, how much was it. Its like are you serious!! We then are all getting up to leave and she asks me to look like I’m walking away so she can take my picture and I just said no. I’m not gonna go strolling away so u can take my picture because it’s never just one picture. I went to the restroom before leaving and when I came back out everyone was then coming over to my house. I wanted to scream. So we all go outside and my grandma goes banana’s saying we need this picture that you wanted. Didn’t I want this picture. NO, YOU DID! I was so ticked off by this point I was on the verge of tears but just smiled through the picture. We then go back to my house; I’m sitting in the car with my stomach in knots because I really don’t want her in my space. We get to the house and she has to keep asking me a million questions about everything and throwing all these passive aggressive comments along with them. I then just start to ignore her basically, spending time with my old roommates and talking to them about the dogs and crap. So she finally leaves and I’m emotionally drained to the point of where I want to just go climb in bed and cry and sleep. My roommates and parents then left shortly after to tackle the traffic. I didn’t want my mom to leave because I felt like I didn’t even get anytime with her. Once everyone was gone I felt horrible. I don’t want to grow up and be like that, I’m tired of having to invite her over for stuff, I’m sick of being treated like a little kid and ‘punished’ for moving to phoenix and for living my own damn life. I don’t even know how to really explain her or how she makes me feel but I’m so sick of her. I know that’s a horrible thing to say about your own grandparents but like my grandpa hardly said 2 words to me the whole time. Why did he even come? If I was such an inconvenience why bother. I’d rather they didn’t then make my day crap. My mom and stepdad are going to be moving to Oregon in probably a year or so and I’ll be stuck with no one near by except them and it kills me.

1 Comment
  1. troubled12 13 years ago

    Wow that really sucks I am sorry you had to go through that.My family is about the same except my dad is the spitting image of your grand mother.I am the Black Sheep since I moved away and influenced my other brothers to leave.I do go home every year for a weekend since my dad has cancer but that hasn't changed the way he acts. If you only have to deal with it once a year be thankful.Now you have a whole year before you have to do ii again.You will only become like them if you choose.Families do suck at times but we are stuck with them and try to make the best of it.I have learned to zone out when I am around my dad.I hope your week gets betterfor you hang in there.I am sure you can write a poem to vent your weekend. It might help you with the healing.Take care.



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