Well at least OCD is good for something. In the last week or so I have read numerous books on addiction, sex addiction drug addiction and how the brain handles these issues. I have come to see all the traits of an addict be it sex, drugs, alcohol etc…  I feel good about myself today. I am understanding myself more and more as I progress through  my therapy. I am focused, on track and proud of my accomplishments. First thing is to realize that you can change. But deep down it’s you whom wants to have this change. All is going good at the moment. I still have more to read and understand but with my daily progressions i am finally finding happiness, peace and understanding as well as being able to look at myself in the mirror. I know my triggers, I know when the trance wanders in for a visit, and I know how to disable the trance. It’s not an easy thing, but OCD focus on something when the trance for sex comes to visit it a nice way to disable that craving.  Although I am not proud of what I have done. I am proud about what I am doing about it. I never realized just how much energy sex addiction can take from your life. I’m tired, really honestly tired of sex if you can believe that.  I focus on my partners face in my head to keep me anchored and it brings me joy and happiness. It’s still a tough road, and I know the pain I caused will take a long time to work through and heal. But the first step was to start to heal me and make myself better and stop the addiction. So over the last week I must say I have improved my mind and my heart.