With this niew house now it seems almost overwhelming. Currently, we've moved in, but there's that half of the stuff that's not unpacked. While at the same time we've got our "Housearming" open house on Sunday. 🙁 I feel bad that it's mostly my stuff. But at the same time, I helped my BF put his stuff away so why won't he help me put mine away? I havn't brought up the subject just yet because I don't like arguments, and this really isn't the time to have any big ones should it escalate to that.

On the other hand, work is getting mroe and more frustraiting. Try as I might it just seems like every day I'm there, someone has some new thign to ether gripe about how I do something; find out something that I made a mistake on; or flat out insist that I'm wrong but won't listen to my explination of why I feel I was right (and may still feel that way too). An example of that last thing would be that a customer wanted a check mailed back to them. I put it in an envelope, addressed it and placed it int he basket for mail. I got yelled at for not wrapping the check in a pice of paper. My coworker that processes the mail insisted someone will steal the check. I asked "What would they do with it? They can't cash it." And all I got was "That's not hte point!!" Since no one would tell me "the point", I was rather angry. If the point was "someone might steal it" then I wanted to know "why". Are they going to roll it up and smoke it? Use it as fire starter? let their dog chew it instead of their homework? What reason would anyone have to steal it at all? It's a cehck made out to a business. No one else can cash it. None. It is worthless. Why would anyone steal something that is worthless? So, by lack of worth, then it's not going to get stollen if there's not a piece of paper around it!

It just seems like I'm in a job that isn't suited for me. That I should be somewhere else. But I think I feel that with every job. Like I'm flighty or something. It doesn't help that several of my international friends tell me how much better employees are being treated in other countries. 🙁

And at this point in time, I'm earning too little to easilly quit and find another job. The best I can do is try and find a job while I still work this one. But this one is so frustraiting that It takes all evening to unwind from it and then I go to bed. This causes a lot of problems with the new house too. I get behind on everything from putting stuff away to figuring out when it's my turn for groceries. My poor BF has had to handle all of the laundry thus far because I can't carry it down into the basement. I can switch the laundry from machines since that's not carying more than a few garments at a time. My back has been getting worse, and with no coverage for it, I cna't go in and do something about it. So isntead I gain weight because I keep trying to limit the work i do that agitates it.

I feel like things aren't ready for the housewarming party, and I jsut don't have the strength, nor the energy to put into it. I thought "The least I could do is arrange the boxes in the storage room to look neat and orderly." but I'm not even allowed to do that much crouching or lifting. 🙁 I just want things to look nice, but I cna't even get the mailbox painted in some fasion that my BF likes.


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