So I get judged because I don't allow comments on my blogs. Maybe that's because I dont' want to get judged by a bunch of people who don't even know me. I am pouring my heart out about what's wrong with me. Depression, anxiety… I am trying to heal by writing and by letting my feelings out in words online. I guess I should just keep a private journal or something. I guess no where where people can read my shit is safe… I was on AT and someone was angry that I don't allow comments and even wrote a blog saying that it's a waste of time to read MY blogs because I dont' allow comments! Saying that people don't measure up to my standards of wonderfullness. That's not it! It's because I'm tired of hearing people's suggestions and judgements of ME when they don't even know ME. I am tired of having to worry what people are going to say about MY problems and MY life. It's even impossible to do because people don't even know me. Not allowing comments is not snobby. I can understand it is a bit frustraiting to read someone's blog then they only allow friends, that's kind of annoying in some ways but to judge someone on it isn't fair. I am only trying to keep myself from getting more and more hurt. Now I don't even want to go back to AT because I feel like I'm hated there. My whole purpose for going was to talk about my anxiety, how awful it is for me to even get up out of bed, how I can't even move from room to room in my own house without having a fucking panic attack. Now I have no where to even talk about that. I guess like I said I should keep a private journal because people are angry that I won't allow comments. Now I am wondering what people think of this I truly am! I think there are a lot of good people on these tribes, but other people who will just take all of this the wrong way and want to lash out and hurt others, that's just not what this is supposed to be for.
Writing was supposed to help me!
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It’s 1:24 am pst
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