All week long, I’ve been in a daze, and it really bugs me. A 14 year old has better sense than to pull some of the stupid shit that I’ve been pulling.
Paying for food, and driving off without it at a drive through.
Paying a toll, and forgeting to get the reciept. (On the job)
Calling my own phone from the trucks phone while trying to answer the trucks phone.
Lighting up a cig right after lighting up a cig.
And a bunch of other things.
I need to get out of this daze before I get really stupid.
I’m hoping that this weekend I can clear my head, before I damage myself.
Smoking an entire pack of cigarettes in 4 1/2 hours can be quite damaging.
I’ve also found myself biting, again. My right hand is numb because of that.
I haven’t been stressing out about anything that I know of that would cause me to be in such a daze, except being in a daze.
My blood sugar is excellent, so it’s not that.
I did have a panic attack earlier while thinking about the difference between air brakes, and hydraulic brakes.
It occurred to me that a leak in a hydraulic system could cause a loss of brakes, and an air brake failure will automatically apply the brakes.
At that moment I didn’t feel safe in my car as it has hydraulic brakes, and I paniced.
I don’t know why I paniced as modern cars have effectively two hydraulic brake systems (front, & rear) as well as a cable operated parking brake, and all the brake systems on my car work well.
I feel like I went through last week upside down, and like it wasn’t me, but like I was someone else with someone else in control.
It’s like watching a movie, instead of living my life.
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