So much for having a relaxing evening. It has started with a bang, and, in a matter of 30mins, i have crashed. I have started drinking, no real surprises there. Why does the simple things not bother anyone else? I’m so supid. honestly why freak out about a new moderator appointment? why? cause your a stupid idiot Jacqui. Thats right. Why can’t you just be happy with it and move on, after all she is your friend right?

I do hope that Surry forgives me.

I wish that i understood why I act the way i do. I have an issue with authority. I don’t know why. I guess if that wasn’t the case I wouldn’t be on probation right now.

So many friends in my life have left me behind when they have been promoted, or given power. It’s just the way things are. The little people always get left behind. Thats life.

I’m never going to amount to anything. I’m always going to be a bottom feeder. Seeping money from the government. I should just go out, get pregnant and live of the government. Thats all i’ll be good for. I’m a good for nothing fat, ugly waste of a life. I should just put myself out of my misery right now.

But i wont. I know you wont jacqui. You are weak. Yes i am weak. I’m a weak horrible bottom feeder. Maybe I should just run away and live in a cabin in the woods. Drinking my home made brew. Just drink my life away. That sounds like a plan.

Drink drink drink jacqui. Thats all your good for. Your so DUMB! you should just give up right now. FFS.