Hi my name is Chris and I think I have depression. A doctor checked me a few years ago and he said I did have depression but I never did anything about it. I feel bad about allot of things especially on the topic of love. I am a 21-year-old virgin who has had some success in the past with getting girls but really nothing. 2 years ago I found someone that I was crazy about and i have never felt that way before. And she told me she loved me. But the thing is she was an exchange student from Germany and she had to leave and that really screwed me up. I was so crazy about her and I didn’t know what to do with myself when I was forced to just let it go. So since then I have grown a little and there have been a few girls but none that I’ve been very comfortable with. So like 2 months ago I found another girl that I really liked and we hit it off a little bit. I think I messed it up by coming on to strong and now things are really weird between us. She rejected me and told me she didn’t want to have a relationship and I haven’t kissed or barely hugged her since then. Were still friends but I feeling tension and I don’t like it. This really plunged me back into the depths of hell. Im also flunking school for the 3rd semester in a row and I don’t have a well paying job nor do I really care anymore. I feel like im going to be a lonely soul forever and I just really want to love and be loved I hate this life. Everything is so standardized and I just want to die can anyone help me or agree with me or just say hello to me please i need some reassurance that its going to be ok, because deep down I really feel like it wont.