Hi again,

Just thought I would write an update on how I am feeling at the moment. BLAH is a good description. I have had some strange things happening at my home over the past week or so, ending with an intruder which has me feeling a bit nervous. My Phlebotomy course is going great and only three days to go before I can do blood collections.  Work is Ok . We lost a lovely gent last night which was sad. So much death around (why cant it be mine) that it is hard to live sometimes. I now have returned to full-time night duty by my own request. Ah the peace of not having the boss present. LOL. .

Home life is still the same Lonely. Not wanting to do the things I have to do like ironing and general housework. It all gets done eventually when I have a burst of activity.  I cry scream and rant at times but no-one hears me I suppose its just as well. Still having counselling where I cry most of the time, Still have cardiac problems which are unresolved. (need surgery but the doc refuses to do it just yet why unknown).

Family is still the same barely hear from them. I have to be the one to make contact.  Now that mum has moved south I am not kept informed re her condition as she only tells me what she thinks I should hear and my sister will not let me be aware that sometimes she struggles with the things that mum does within her illness.  According to my sister most of it is MY fault anyway. I didn't know that I was soooo powerful that I could bring on strokes, heart attacks and dementia. Who knew. And she, the nurse with 40 years experience. Thank god you can pick your friends because family are strange.