Okay, so I thought I felt bad yeserday. I feel worse today. Urgh! I feel like my depression is getting worse. My mum said earlier 'why do you always have a face on you, im sick of it'. So I turned around and said 'mum, I hate it when you say that, Or when you say I am grumpy. There is always a reason, You could just say whats wrong amber insted of yelling at me'. And all she said was, 'well, you do have a face on you'. That shows how much she understands. ZERO BLOODY PERCENT. She doesnt even care. The one time I tell her how im feeling and she throws it back at me. All I know is that it made me feel so much worse. I just feel like crying right now. I really do. And cuting. Crying and cutting. But I cant do either. I didnt get a very good sleep AGAIN last night. And I dont even feel like eating…usually I love to eat. And usually when i feel crap I over eat. Not under eat :/ I just really hate life. I am fed up of it. Feeling miserable ALL of the time. I dont know whetehr I should say to my mum that my depression is back, because I am tired of faking hapiness. BUt if I do, I think she will just flip. Or tell me not to be silly. Or send me to a stupid shrink. The therpist did not help last time, I dont think it is going to help again. I feel like i am having a break down, and no one can see it. I am going to my grandparents later, and as usual I am going to have to pretend to be happy. I really really hate myself right now. I really do. Life is just urgh. I am feeling so low, I dont know how to feel better again. I just wnat to be happy. But all I feel like doing right now is crying :'(