I was born on 15th January 1980, and, was educated to university level.

I live in a bedroom and my ergonomic chair is decorated with chains, I feel like a prisoner of my own poverty.

Life in school was interesting but not very uplifting until I encountered friends I met off school whom I regret having allowed to influence me.  I did not have a fancy for sport I preferred mathematics somehow.  I wrote my first computer game when I was fiddling with BASIC programming language in 1992, so I devoted my life to reading computer science and programming languages, becoming a respected software engineer for a while as well.  Career promotion was mainly lateral I was given new tasks and coding projects to work upon which seemed like old wine in new bottles to myself as I discovered new depths of software code all the time and sorted out logical problems using code.  Nowadays it feels like confused knowledge.  Nowadays Bill Gates is quoted saying that it must be logical a matter is our fault if we wrote it spelt backwards, but no that is not the real matter, professor, that is called dyslexia it is a side-effect of your design, actually.

I have a mental self-concept of my personality as routine-based and I find it very difficult to snap out of my routine as I grow older, and, I also find it more difficult to grasp learning concepts and apply them my learning curve feels worse when I am being tested for intelligence, so I feel intellectually disabled, not just depressed, sad and lonely.  A friend of mine accentuated the existence of loneliness as influenced by behaviour by quoting the old English saying \”beggars are not choosers\”, I thought, well, his girlfriend must be a law student, actually.

Life inspired me until I started odd people and I realised how odd people are as I met more people in my life whereas the more people I meet the more comfortable I feel with the theory  that most people are predictable, and, this is not a very optimistic outlook all the time.  It is not fair to my own self-interest that institutions continue to discriminate against me by controlling resources in a manner that is of breach to my privacy and fundamental rights and to further add insult to injury by having their staff act in a negligent or manner that appears to be un-ethically insensitive to the needs of the polity.  Now life is inspiring me to be half trusting of third parties particularly persons who call themselves professional and who act in a different way that seems to indicate defamatory emotional communication.

I live in the social class of society where wealth seems to be held in a vault that opens only for others, culture here is nihilist people only put pressure when they want free monetary gifts or favors from you therefore it had to be established a principle of restitution that seems to be foregone by some persons who claim to be wealthy merely because they ask money from the poor to their coffers others promise love and return nothing, I think for the most part people are dreamers non doers and when they do they seem to do something wrong in any case irrespective of gender, age, nationality, social class and other criteria determined for legal purposes.

I was confident, I am now frustrated, and I have returned my psychology to the time when I was sixteen and wrote down my hate in poetry.

What would you do differently?