Hello, it’s been a long time since I have written a blog, but I was sitting here alone today and felt I needed to write. I guess I don’t need to go into detail on how I feel, because most of us with anxiety disorders or depression already know how it feels. I have been trying everything lately to get through my anxiety and depression, but for some reason my anxiety gets better but my depression gets worse. I don’t really know what I would rather have the anxiety or depression. I don’t have any energy to do anything. I get some sleep at night, but I’m up for a few hours during the day then right back into bed. I can’t seem to stay awake no matter how hard I try.

 

I have been trying very hard to have a stronger faith in God. I have been praying everyday, I read as much as I can and watch the religious channels. It fills me up to a point, but sometimes I wonder if my disorder is too much to treat. I have been on all types of medication, but they make me feel not like myself. Of course I have to take something because my depression gets out of hand. I feel so stuck most of the time and don’t know which way to go. For those who know me I also suffer from Agoraphobia and that keeps me in my home most of the time. This allows my depression to feed and to grow which is really hard. 

 

Thank you for listening, I guess I needed to get it out and off my chest. I feel really lost right now and my support person is busy this weekend so it makes it hard when you really want to talk not to have that person to talk to. I will overcome this no matter what and I will do it with God’s help. I might not like the answers I get most of the time, but with his help I will overcome this.

 

Eric