It was brought to my attention that I was suffering from a broken heart. I never thought about it that way. I believe I have been in mourning. I have mourn for my grandmother who passed away eight years ago. Even thought I have accepted her death I still have moments in life when I would much rather be died then to continue to live this life of disappointed actions of others, late payment of bills that leads to late fees and empty promises. But broken hearted?? I must say there are many reason to have broken heart considering the many emotional battles that are happening at once. I have been told that there isn't a broken heart that heaven can't fix but what if the cure for my broken heart is to finally take my place in heaven. Where is the honor in living in pain, where is the honor in struggling and suffering through life. Where is honor incontinuingto give and give and not recieving the same thing in the return. Yes I do feel my heart is broken and yes that is reason why I continue to have pains that feel as if in the very moment my life will end. The songs says I should hold on that God has not forgot about me. I don't think God has forgotten about me. Maybe it is not time to finally be free from my darkness, maybe my darkness is suppose to continue for some reason in which I could not fathom. Maybe me talking about and giving a voice to my darkness will help others realize that they are not alone in theirfeelings. The truth is life is no walk through the park. Life events, illness, deaths, finanicial problem, marriage, divorce and children can all contribute to having depression and instead of pretending that these things do not exist maybe its time to stand up and YES I AM SAD ALOT !!! YES MY CHEST HURT because of this or that YES getting out of bed each day is such a struggle and YES i would prefer not to be here but at the end of the day I AM….. I am strong then my depression and even if my heart is broken and I still standing. I may getknocked down but I am not down for the count. My darkness will one day become my LIGHT!!!!

2 Comments
  1. Andie372 6 years ago

    Have you sought treatment for your depression?  Yes God is always with us but sometimes we have to pick up the shield and sword and fight.  There is nobility in struggle, it makes us stronger in the end.  Don't give up.

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  2. iwant2smileagain 3 years ago

    I wonder where u are in life now..
    whats your after story.. this is your before.. or your meantime.. where’s your after.. I need hope. bcz I have given up.

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