So my mother has forbidden me and my boyfriend from dating. Now, lets just get one thing straight… We have been dating for 1 year, 2 months, and 11 days so I am NOT going to just stop going out with him because my mother told me not to. This whole thing is my fault making me want to kick myself in the A**. So my mother gets a hold of my journal (in other words… my diary…) and she F-ing reads it. One diary entry! That's really all that she has against me but still! One f-ing diary entry and sudden we are forbidden to date. I am so stupid! I really couldn't be any more stupid…

I'm stuck inside the house all the time because my boyfriend lives only one street down from us so she doesn't want me going to him. I feel like a prisoner in my own house… I have gone from seeing my boyfriend almost 24/7 from only really seeing him at school (granted that is only for a couple seconds.) The longest time that we see each other is one the bus when we sit next to each other. Even that's only 5 maybe 10 minutes if I am lucky… I HATE IT!!!!!! I HATE IT! I HATE IT! I HATE IT SO GOD DAMN MUCH!!!!!!!!! I want to cut myself over the whole f-ing situation. My mother hates me right now for no god damn reason. SHE TOLD ME HERSELF that I could do what she read. Although what does she do when I actually do it? She forbids us to date?!?!!? Like WTF? Then when I apoligize through home made breakfast and a powerpoint (don't say anything about that… we have a history with the powerpoints…) she doesn't even really like it… She said she appreciated it which for her is like I hate it. I work really hard on that. I lost a a couple nights of sleep over that. I fixed her an omelet (granted it was a little burnt on the edges and didn't look pretty but did taste good) she said she wasn't an omelet person. I made her a banana and strawberry smoothie and she took one sip…. I just… I just…. want to cut myself! I miss my boyfriend like crazy. I kind of hate my mom right now. And I'M TIRED BEYOND BELIEF!!!!

I'm just so done with everything.