lately ive been thinking alot…which is a constant…but LATELY ive been thinking about myself a bit more…and who i am. i can't figure it out. i am so many things that contradict each other, it doesnt make sense. i was watching an episode of law and order SVU a few weeks ago…and there were two abused children that the detectives were working with..(trying to find their abuser). the shrink..dr.wong…lol…well he talked to them and one child was violent and cold-hearted and defiant…and the other was…extremely loving, overly affectionate and clingy…wanting the detectives to take her home with them. after the sessions with the kids…the detectives were puzzled why the two children were so different…and then dr.wong explained it. when an infant is neglected, abused, ignored, not given any love or affection…two things can happen as it grows…it will either give up on love and caring and lash-out, not trusting anyone at all….or it will over-compensate for what it lacks…and search for love everywhere…becoming extremely affectionate and searching for praise, or positive attention. after watching this my mind started racing…and i wondered if maybe that is why i am who i am. i am not the first example…but the second. i think that is how all my social anxiety started. searching for love and being overly sweet, wanting to always please and change myself to suit who i am with…never getting angry with anyone for hurting me…just wanting them to like me…not causing any problems. after many years of this i got hurt so often, was rejected so often, that i retreated. i became scared that people wouldnt like me, so i decided to never make myself available to these "people". needless to say…i was abused/neglected in this manner and it has affected me. and i dont like it. i dont want to be this way. i never ever EVER feel happy unless people like me. and by people, i mean anyone. maybe thats why in the past ive had very low standards about who my friends are, or my lovers. i didnt care who they were, just as long as they liked me. crazy stuff. well, i guess thats all.just thought i'd share that interesting theory…in case anyone else has been abused at a very early age and is now wondering what it might have done to them, or how it affected them…
Related Articles
-
What Gives
Kitt1144, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Career, Relationships, 0
I used to have everything in order. I had everything in high school. I was at the top of...
-
“Have You Lost Your Wigwam?”
layllove2004, , Anxiety, Anxiety, 0
Have you lost your wigwam: Emmet Fox During the old days in the West, a party of trappers entered...
-
-
First time
avsgirl, , Anxiety, Anger, Anxiety, Depression, Parenting, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 2
This is the first time I have written a blog. I'm new to the tribe and have never really...
-
Just A Few More Funnies From Church …
Shelley5716, , Anxiety, Anxiety, Child, Religion, 3
On Christmas afternoon, the Pastor's wife dropped into an easy chair saying, "Boy! Am I ever tried." Her husband...
-
My Current Sittuation
justbreathe444, , Addiction, Anxiety, Depression, Addiction, Anxiety, Child, Relationships, 0
Dating back to 2015 I felt my fears and regrets as a child catch up to me, I didn’t...
-
When no one cares
Dayisdone, , Anxiety, HIV or Aids, Marriage & Family, Career, 1
I hate one say that they care about you and honestly didn’t really don’t. People they say all the...
-
dark times..
delane1, , Anxiety, Depression, Marriage & Family, OCD, Grief, Stress, 2
Shortly more than a month from now, the one-year “anniversary” of my daughter’s death will be here. *sigh Sitting...
0 Comments