Hey guys!

How are you? I hope doing better than i am right now. My whole body hurts cause ive been working out more and im just stressed out. Why is my OCD so bad right now?   B/c everything is going right. I have my best friend and having the time of our lives and the best boyfriend MoRgAn any girl could ask for. I just dont’ understand why im so stressed. Morgan copes so well, i was scared to tell him cause i didn’t want him to think i was wacky. But im so glad i told him. I could tell him anything. I just feel so comfortable with him. I love how he reacted to me telling him. We had a long talk and i felt like 100000 times lighter afterwards. My report in english took me writting it over like 12 times today (literally) and it drove me crazy. I just feel like im going crazy. I am so anxious about cleaning and putting everything in its right place. I can’t believe how good it can be one day and how i can’t even get out of bed the next. I am so freaked out not to metion i can’t take my meds’ b/c i feel SOOO SICK! All the time. I really hope i don’t have mono like i did last year cause that is how i am feeling.  I don’t know why but i tap all the time. Does anyone else do this???? I do everything in fours. And my counting is just worst than ever. Sorry to bitch to you guys but i just need to complain right now. My day will go so much better if i do. I still have like 4 1/2 hours of school left and im going nuts.

Talking to you guys and my lovely MoRgAn! Well, thank you guys for being here for me. You all mean so much to be. Morgan i want to be with you forever <3. Thanksgiving is almost here and im so thankful for my life. I am so grateful for my life but feel bad cause im always so stressed and ocd is so bad. Please keep me in ur thoughts and  i just want you guys to know if i can help you out with anything i will be more than happy to.

Happy ‘early’ Thanksgiving! 🙂


Love always,



MORGAN! I can’t wait for you to meet the family. Thanks for your support on here and in my life. YOu mean so much to me. Thanks for everything you do and will contuion to do! <3 ur girly rach

SOrry im talking in thoughts. <3

  1. Uphill2plateau 16 years ago

    I TAP! I Tap 3 times. And I have several issues typing and completing documents. This site has helped me so much. You know this relapse I am having this time is so much harder for me because I know what it is like for me to feel free. I found out that one of the reasons that I had a bit of a spike in OCD is due to finding someone amazing. I am invested and vulnerable. I get the right kind of enabling…which sometimes I wish I didn't. With this unconditional love and support I got FREAKED. The thoughts came rushing in. We talked through it and now I feel trustworthy and I can trust this relationship. But the stress and transition ooooh shoot…it's tough. I'm feeling like I am climbing out of a cacoon all over again.

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  2. js33345 16 years ago

    i tap too, and i count everything in fours or in eights. i usually tap 4 or 8  times too. i know how ya feel!

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  3. tmbxbmt 16 years ago

    Rachel I'm sorry things have been so bad for you right now with all this. I'm always here! Whenever you need me!

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