Even if i was born into a normal family with a normal life i would still be able to mess things up. It does not matter what i do, even if i make good choices they would still manage to backfire and put me in another bad place surrounded by bad people. I try my best to make my life easier and to try to get out of the gangs and violence but no matter what i do i only make things worse in the long run. I try to stay positive but what point in my life do i just give up and say that my life is clearly always going to be bad, its just the way i was made to be. I try to change, i always will. But i just wonder when my decisions end up getting me killed. I have almost died multiple times because of the choices i made i am scared i guess. Scared to loose everything. Scared that one day i wont be able to handle what i am going through. Scared that one day i wont wake up, i will just be stuck. People would remember me by the unlucky one with the bad family and life, that made all those bad decisions and could never helps herself no matter how many therapists she got sent to. I know, I know ‘ i am only young, how much trouble could i really be in’ right? That is what everyone says. Everyone says that we can’t be going through this as we are  not adults yet. They don’t realise that we can go through just as much as adults can, we just do not get talked about as much as we try to sort it out ourselves and we do not run to the newspaper or social media so we can get attention for what we went through like they do. We can go through just as much as they can, it’s just not herd of as much as we do not make such a big deal about it and get hundreds of other people involved with the problems we are stuck in. Anyway that’s my opinion. But what do i know, i’m just a kid. Anyone agree with me? or is it just me?

 

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