Well G\’day from Australia!
My heart felt \’sorries\’ for not being on here much and you know what? I\’m not even going to bore you with excuses, I just haven\’t been here.
What have I been up to? Hmmm…well, I\’ve been busy with uni and I have one exam next week then I\’m done for the year. I\’m going a subject over summer and that starts four days after my exam so I get a four day holiday YAY!!
My dancing concert is coming up. This is the must anxious time of year. Everyone wants everything NOW. Everyone starts talking about next year and how my dancing school is no longer doing it for them and I fight to keep my head above water. I started my dancing school 6 years ago now, with 19 students. I grew to about 50 then 54 the year after then down to 40, 36 and this year 33, with 13 enrollments for next year. *sigh* Mum and Dad say that I shouldn\’t worry. I\’ve done well. I have a lady in the next town that is threatening to take over my dancing school, so I\’m worried. I have two FANTASTIC ideas implemented this year, but they didn\’t get off the ground because the shire in the next town and this other lady stole my ideas and made them big.
Depression…you gotta love it. It\’s a rollercoaster you never want to get on and it isn\’t even your choice to get on it. I\’d stay in bed for the rest of my life if I could. I keep thinking that in another 2 years I\’m going to be a teacher. I have made sooooooo many stupid decisions and actions when in my dancing school that it makes me not want to be a teacher anymore even though I feel I\’d be a good one. It makes me not want to continue because all I would do is make bad decisions.
I found an ad looking for travel companions from this website…http://www.leisureoptions.com.au/ how exciting. I could get away and have fun and all sorts of stuff. But, as usual I get talked out of it and I\’m stuck at home, I don\’t have any friends and …yup…here comes that thought again…I just wana die. I thought those thoughts had gone, but I guess I\’ve lost so much time off my life now that I haven\’t done anything and I won\’t have a life until Mum and Dad dies and I don\’t want them to. It would just be easier to die.
Well, my love to all and I will try to pop in more often.
Hugs to all and a big kangaroo bouncy kiss!