I have been getting therapy through the school and today I had therapy. I have been holding out for 2 long weeks for this small bit of help. Things have been so bad for me lately I have been having trouble even getting out of bed and going to class. I felt proud of myself the other day when I forced myself to go and at least try even though I shamed myself by bawling my eyes out in class. When I showed today my therapist esentually told me that my program is being terminated and that I will no longer be recieving help through the school. I was hardly hoding on as it is now without this little extra help I don't feel like I can keep trying to go to class at all. I feel betrayed. I have tried to go through the propper channels for everything and at every turn I have been let down. I asked for help and instead of recieving support what little help I was getting was taken from me. WHen I cried in class people noticed but noone even asked if i was okay or what was wrong. It really hurt seeing how little I must mean to them that they couldn't even be bothered to care. On top of that I have been getting no support from my family and some of them even worse things then just ignoring me. Im reaching out here because I am hoping that someone will read this and show me that there are people that have been through this that have found people to care about their well being. I want to believe that things can get better but it's really hard to see that when need support and being denied to me. I hope this finds whoever reads this in better spirits than me and even in my saddness I hope this does something possitive for someone I feel like such a burden most of the time.
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The loneliness that consumes me.
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