I know I haven’t been here in what seems like ages, but right now I could use some help. As of yesterday I’ve been anxious, depressed and sick and I have no idea what it’s coming from. It might be hormones, it might be my thoughts, or it might just be a cold I caught. I’ve missed two days of school and have done nothing but sleep and eat. Mostly sleep. I know this isn’t what I should be doing; I know I should fight against the sadness and lethargy, but somehow it gets the better of me. I haven’t seen my therapist since she got laid off. I wish I could find her again because I really need someone to talk to that understands why I’m like this. I really hope it’s just PMS wrecking havoc and that it will go away soon, but on top of the anxiety and depression I also feel hopeless. I don’t know why! Before all this I had been feeling happy and secure, if not ecstatic. Even though we’ve had fights my boyfriend and I are closer than we’ve ever been; I’m coming to grips with the loss of one my cats and my unexplained seizure back in January, which still disturbs me from time to time, and I was beginning to get back into the swing of college. And now? I’m back to where I started- alone, afraid, and disgusted with myself. I can’t control the beating of my heart and my stomach churns with all the revolting thoughts and feelings I’ve been having. I wish I could turn back time and erase everything that hurts me…But I know I can’t. I don’t know what to do. I feel like curling up into a ball and crying. I haven’t felt this bad in a while, and I only hope it goes away soon. Thanks for listening to me.