I could cry and cry and cry all day and Zach wouldn't even notice… why do I go on pretending like he cares about me at all… Somehow I'll convince myself of it again…. and I'm back to being here, alone, feeling stupid, worthless… It's so fuckin dumb. omfg it's so dumb. I want to break something it's so dumb… I want to fuckin kill something it's so fuckin dumb. I am soangry! I can't even cry right now I'm so angry. God damn. It's times like these I realize that nothing in the fuckin world matters. There is nothing! It's always going to be stupid bullshit. My whole life. This is what I am and will always be. Fuck trying to make a better life for myself. It's pointless. My heart will always be black and selfish…. Fuck every person that has ever existed. I hate everyone. I hate happy people that laugh and joke and smile like they're so fuckin smart. I hate hating myself because I can't be like them. I hate myself. I'm so fuckin tired of ranting… but this is all I'm thinking right now. It's like a broken fuckin record. It makes no sense, but this is my mind. I'm so fuckin tired of being me but I can't fuckin help it. I try to fuckin change and it's never fuckin enough. Screw me and my life and my ambitions and my troubles and my cares and my emotions and my thoughts and my voice and my everything! God I want to die right now. I don't care at all right now. I don't fuckin care about anything! I'm glad. I'm going to quit caring. It only causes me pain. So fuck feelin anything. Fuck being "right" or trying. Fuck the idiots in the world that can't realize that there are other fuckin people other than themselves. Fuck all those idiots. I'm fuckin tired of caring about idiots that can't even comprehend that I exist. Here comes the crying again… I'm a fuckin wreck of a person. That's all I'll ever fuckin be. I should just go sleep for a couple days.
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The loneliness is slowly killing me
Somak, , Anxiety, Depression, LGBT, Depression, 0
Hello. I dont know how to start this but hey here goes. A little about me first. Im a...
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So fed up!!
Jgirl, , Depression, Career, OCD, 0
I am still feeling like I am in my funk and after work tonight I could just scream. It...
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How do you know that something is REALLY wrong?
Ghostgirl, , Depression, Anger, Anxiety, OCD, Relationships, Therapist, Therapy, 2
I keep feeling like I'm making something out of nothing so I haven't called the Counseling Center yet. But...
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Nope, not anger.
bunny1945, , Depression, Anger, Anxiety, Borderline Personality Disorder, Domestic Abuse, Hoarding, Sleep Disorders, Therapist, 1
I can't sleep, and for some reason, I don't want to take trazodone. Which is total treatment interfering if...
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The Beginning of the Downward Spiral
Diverumortus, , Depression, Career, Depression, Medication, Suicide, 3
I’ve been depressed for years, I recognized my depression when I was just seven. Constant arguing between my parents,...
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Juice Fast – Day 3
lisaemc2, , Depression, Herbal Remedies, Infidelity, Sleep Disorders, Weight Loss, 0
I told someone when I first started my fast that I was a bit of a wimp. Right now...
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This is how therapy should effect people
Stormbringer, , Depression, Anger, Anxiety, Child, Depression, Hypnotherapy, Self Esteem, Therapy, 1
I just want to let people know the power of therapy, this is not meant to offend or annoy...
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Blah
lookingforward, , Depression, Child, Divorce, Questions, Relationships, 0
So the past couple days have been pretty lame. I’ve been playing the role of the victim and...